Sometimes I'm Grateful for Bad "News": Ministers, Ministries, & Abuse Allegations
This morning on my way to work, I started listening to The New Evangelicals podcast—Ep. 187 about “Surviving IHOP.”* Recently, the news broke that Mike Bickle, leader of the International House of Prayer and Forerunner Church in Kansas City, has been accused of sexual abuse spanning decades. It’s possible Bickle could be cleared of all allegations, but based on the statement released by his leaders, this seems doubtful, as at least one allegation from 26 years ago has been found “credible.” The allegations are severe and devastating.
As I was driving and listening to the three podcast guests introduce themselves and their relationship to IHOP, an unexpected mix of relief and gladness flooded my body—relief that this was all finally coming out even though, of course, I hadn’t been waiting for it. But I felt gladness, all the same, believing that people who suffered for so long in silence had the courage to speak and press until they were listened to.
In the past, when I’ve heard of a minister or ministry’s reputation going up in flames, my responses have ranged from grief to sorrow to anger. In my early twenties, I felt personally betrayed by a Canadian worship leader/recording artist who cheated on his wife (“If he can’t walk with integrity, how will anyone else??”). There was much I had yet to understand about human nature. But grief, sorrow, anger—all of those responses are par for the course for me. The news about Bickle is hard for many, including me and my friends, to hear. And, assuming one or some of these allegations are true, I do lament Bickle’s sin, and I pray that he is willing to behold this exposure like the gift that it is, for the sake of his own soul, so that he may confess and be healed.
But today relief surged alongside an upswell of gratitude because those who claim to have suffered in silence for decades are being taken seriously. The bad-to-us “news” of this past weekend is nothing compared to actual abuse experienced by abuse survivors. “News” is in fact a misnomer. Headlines about church abuse have always only named the long-standing realities of haunted people whose prayers have echoed Psalm 13:
How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
*Note, I was five minutes in, so I am not giving an endorsement of the podcast’s contents.
Thanks for reading! I’m a book-obsessed pastor, podcaster, author, and holistic life and leadership coach. For essays and podcasts that come straight to your inbox, subscribe to this Dear Exiles newsletter in the subscription box above. Fun fact: I’m also the author of Dear Boy:, An Epistolary Memoir and the host of the Your Pastor Reads Books podcast.